Yesterday at church was one of those mornings where I shuttled from one thing to the next without feeling like I did anything well. I missed Sunday school because I was nursing Charlie and then it was too late to join the class without majorly interrupting. Joe was assisting in the worship service and so that means he is up front until just before the sermon; he comes and sits with us during the sermon. Will and Joseph are usually quite squirmy and need lots of redirection some mornings during church. Yesterday was one of those. About 5 minutes into the sermon, Charlie was too fitful to be in the service (and I thought that he might be getting sick and so he couldn't go in the nursery) and so I slipped out to take care of him.
As I was walking out to the car after church, I started to feel sorry for myself. I hadn't worshiped. I had been distracted and doing something for my children all morning rather than worshiping. I missed Sunday School. I had a few quick, surface conversations with other believers, but not much substantive. All I wanted to do was to be able to worship God without interruptions. Is that too much to ask? Why am I always so busy with my children? Why don't they behave/sit quietly/not need me so much so that I can at least participate in church? Why can't I do what I want to do?
As I walked out to the car thinking about this, I realized something vital.
This is my worship.
Being a mama to these boys that the Lord has given me. Obediently submitting to His call on my life. Focusing on their discipline instead of my agenda. Caring for a baby. Reacting with peace when plans don't go my way.
To obey is better than sacrifice. 1 Samuel 15:22b
There is nothing magic about being about to sit through a sermon quietly, or going to Sunday School, or talking with other Christians that makes going to church be true worship. The Lord God is real and active, and by obeying Him in doing the work that He has given me to do in being a wife and mama, I am worshiping Him with my life.
But the hour is coming, and is now here, when the true worshipers will worship the Father in spirit and truth, for the Father is seeking such people to worship him. John 4:23
Crystal wrote a post along these same lines that talks about how she has realized that her ministry right now is her family. It was right on target. And especially pertinent to a pastor's wife. It is too easy to neglect the simple and sometimes mundane in favor of "ministry." The good can trump the best.
Monday, November 26, 2007
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2 comments:
Oh, Hallie! These really are "big thoughts!" Thank you so much for sharing. This IS my worship, too. Thank goodness that God allows me to try over and over again to obey Him joyfully!
Amen, Hallie! What a great reminder.
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