Educated at a prestigious university? Check. Prepared to be a wife and mom? Um, not quite. Brains do not equal thriving motherhood. Biblically, it is God’s will for most of us to marry and have kiddos, but for so long I focused on just “me and the Lord” that I didn’t prepare myself as well as I could have. There are things that I wish I had known or worked on before I became a mom. This post is an attempt to pass on a little encouragement to those of you that are not yet in the mom years. It is not the Gospel, so faithful Christians can disagree with what I am about to write--it is just a recommendation. It also is not my final opinion on the matter, but just the scratchings of one stint at the computer during one of my boys’ naptimes.
For my first “Preparing for Motherhood” post, I wanted to share a few thoughts about money.
Get out of debt or stay out of debt.
Many moms say that finances are the reason that they have to work. One of my really good friends from high school got her law degree after her time at UVa and worked as a lawyer for a time before delivering her first baby over two months premature. She took some maternity leave just afterwards, but had to leave her preemie in the NICU to go back to work in order to save some maternity leave for when he was released from the hospital. She was up to her eyeballs in student loan debt and would’ve loved to stay home but felt trapped.
The same problem comes with any debt (car loans, credit cards, home equity loans, even mortgages that are too big). Debt can trap a young couple and money problems are the #1 cause of divorce in America today. Similarly, as a single, you are uniquely positioned to economize and save, providing a solid foundation for whatever God may have planned for you. In several recent articles in Boundless, they’ve talked about single women and money (see articles here, here, and here) and really made me think, In either case—married or single--if you can’t afford it (i.e. pay for it with cash today), don’t buy it! As Will Rogers said, "Too many people spend money they have not earned, to buy things they do not want, to impress people they don't even like."
Live on one income now.
If married, budget so that you are already living on just your husband’s income. If you learn now the discipline of living on one income, it won’t be a shock to do so later. As a bonus, by saving the money that you make now, you’ll have an extra big cushion for when you are at home.
Start investing while you are young.
If you are single, use this season in your life to learn to live on less than you make and pile money into savings.
If you invest just $100 a month (which is just eating out or cable money for many people) from age 20-60 in a good growth stock mutual fund earning 12% you will have $1,185,782. Wow! Compounding interest and leaving the money invested over a long time worked in your favor to set you up comfortably for retirement and free you to use your wealth to God’s glory. The government certainly isn’t going to do it for you (who knows if Social Security will even be around when we retire).
Count the cost.
For those of you that are married and thinking that you can’t give up your income, consider the actual net income generated by your job. There are many excellent articles on this out there. It sometimes boils down to the fact that the wife’s income is really just to pay for daycare (so sad) and the higher tax bracket.
Realize that it is all God’s anyway.
The One who clothes the lilies of the field will even more so provide for his people (Matthew 6:28). Chinese Christians actually pray for American Christianss that we may be able to withstand the temptation and trial of prosperity without abandoning our Lord. Start now to tithe to your local church and give consistently to other Kingdom work above and beyond your regular tithe. Luis Cataldo used to say that some of us would be called to serve the Lord in full time ministry. Others would be called to make a good income and live on only half of it to give the rest away for ministry.
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